Whats wrong with Richie? Part 2

David Crowder signs one of my favorite songs, “everything glorious”! The chorus goes “You make everything glorious, You make everything glorious, You make everything glorious and I am yours so what does that make me?” You know my intention with sharing some of what is going on in my life was to show how God is working and to help others understand “what is going on with Richie?” I was gonna post about once or twice a week until today. I have been barraged by “Christians” who are telling me that I am “seeking attention” or “the world sees how you are acting”. One thing I noticed is that none of these asked how they could help or pray for me…………. Wow! So here is another part of the story of Richie! As I sat in that Wal-Mart parking lot crying over what was to come. Feeling abandoned, betrayed and alone I felt God push me on and say this is a path I want you to walk. Now I wasn’t a saint or Billy Graham or anything like that! I was mad at the world mad at my wife and family and friends for not being there when I needed them! Little did I know the free fall I was beginning! I returned home and had a “discussion” with my wife who didn’t realize exactly with the doctor had told me. But God wanted me to walk this path and I accepted it! I began taking my pills. Little by little a dark cloud began to surround my little world. I became easily irritated especially with my family and my children. Which hurts me to this day! We won’t even talk about driving around to Brainerd or the cities! The few friends I had I totally withdrew from any interaction with them. I surround myself with no one! I soon realized how alone I was….I mean who does the Pastor confide in? Who does he talk to when he has problems? Whose shoulder does he cry on? I was alone with all this pent up anger, frustration, fear and trepidation. I was spiraling farther and farther in to my dark world filled with loneliness and hopelessness. Likely my wife began to see that something was seriously wrong! She began to look at the drugs I was on and suspected that this new one was causing some problems. But through the Doctors advice and others I continued to take the drug. Its Christmas time and I don’t want to see anyone! At all! Worse upon that while I am sinking into my darkness farther and farther on Christmas day I get the flu! I wanted to die….not just because of the flu but I was convinced that my family would be better off with out me! These days are the worst days of my life in this time period! Worse then losing my dad! I began not sleeping very much or at all. The teens at my church had an all night bowling lock in on Dec 29th. I came home from that lock in and slept one hour. That was it! From Dec 29th to Jan 6th I slept one hour total and that was after the lock in. This is the darkness I never want to experience again. The hopelessness was choking me. The anger I should my children frightened me and the fear that I might do something to them scared me beyond belief. During this time I am anything but a rational person. The world was out to get me! I couldn’t even go in the bedroom to try and sleep! I was on the edge and that edge was the world is better off with Richie! My family will be better without the stress of dealing with me. It was January 5th a Sunday, I have church, not a lot of things for me to do that day because teen challenge is at church. I sat in the back in a complete shroud of darkness, regret, fear and hopelessness. The service ended we went home….the kids were playing in the living room, Beth is on the phone and computer in her office. I went to my bedroom and cried like the was no tomorrow, because I knew there wouldn’t be! I reached up and pulled out my black H&K 9mm loaded it and sat on my bed. If you don’t believe in miracles you’re a idiot! I have more to this story obviously but I don’t leave you hanging too much because I am still here typing! But When I write the next parts of my story I want you to understand yes this is personal but if it helps one person it is totally worth it! For those of you who say continue to say I am just seeking attention, yes you are right! I am jumping up and down saying God does miracles! Don’t look at me but look at what God can do in your life! I am not worried about how you perceive me, I worry about how God perceives me!

I wanna be rich!!!

I Wanna be Rich?
Sound familiar? It should, it is the underlying ideology in our culture. Now I am not saying that all of us want to be Bill Gates or Donald Trump or that we want to have private planes to fly off to Hawaii whenever we desire. What I am saying is that everything that drives our economy and American way of life is the need, or you can say greed, for the dollar. We are conditioned to make more then our parents. We are marketed to in a way that drives us to get better cars, bigger televisions and smarter phones then our neighbor. The American dream has changed from simply being free to live and direct my life as I choose to having it all!  Now there is nothing wrong with that, however, it has changed the perspective on what it means to be rich. Let's look at the perspective of just how rich we are in the US.

 If you are making the median income in the US, $32,000, you are part of the 1 percent richest in the world! How is that for a perspective? Scary to think that I am included in the richest in the world. Consider the fact that just being born in the US ranks you in the 20% richest in the world. You live in a country that contains 80% of the wealth in the world. The problem isn’t with the riches of the United States, it is with our perspective of money and riches.

Look at a Bible passages with me, 1 Timothy 6:6-14;

6:6 Now godliness combined with contentment brings great profit. 6:7 For we have brought nothing into this world and so we cannot take a single thing out either. 6:8 But if we have food and shelter, we will be satisfied with that. 6:9 Those who long to be rich, however, stumble into temptation and a trap and many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. 6:10 For the love of money is the root of all evils. Some people in reaching for it have strayed from the faith and stabbed themselves with many pains.

6:11 But you, as a person dedicated to God, keep away from all that. Instead pursue righteousness, godliness, faithfulness, love, endurance, and gentleness. 6:12 Compete well for the faith and lay hold of that eternal life you were called for and made your good confession for in the presence of many witnesses. 6:13 I charge you before God who gives life to all things and Christ Jesus who made his good confession before Pontius Pilate, 6:14 to obey this command without fault or failure until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ.

There is a lot in this bible passage that speaks to us about our lives and dealing with money! My intention though is just to point out a couple of things. Look with me at verse 6. Paul is writing this to Timothy who is following in Paul's footsteps as a preacher and pastor. Notice what he tells him brings profit, Godliness and contentment. Does that sound like the current American philosophy? Not even close! Yes the desire to gain wealth has always been around and it will never go away. But what is missing in society is contentment. The overwhelming desire for more is increasing in society. Why are we not content with what we have? Paul answered this for us in the beginning of the verse, Godliness. We are further away from God as a culture then ever before. We could look to the old testament and see many examples of the children of Israel drift away from God. Each time they would drift we can see them becoming more discontent in their lives and country. This drift is caused by a heart condition.

That brings me to the second point in this bible passage and probably the most recognizable verse in this passage. Verse 10, speaks not some much about money as it does about the condition of our heart. If money is what we love, then our hearts and minds will be consumed with its courtship. That is what bible hear is warning us about! Remember what Jesus said, "Where you treasure is, there will be your heart also." In the United States our heart is in money. Every political decision is wrapped about in money. The bottom line has become more important the people. This is true in government and in the private sector. You see our hearts, eyes, minds have the wrong perspective.

We find our perspective laid out for us in verse 11. We are to pursue righteousness, godliness, faithfulness, love, endurance, and gentleness. Think about that for a second. If each one of us this month just worked on doing these things what our country would look like! All theological and spiritual implication aside, if we just pursued these things what a transformation we would go through in every sector.

  

So has does this apply to America today? We really have no idea how wealthy we are in the US. Our perspective of what is poor is so skewed we are confused as to what is poor.  I don’t intend to say we should not be helping those in our country who are needy. My point is we have to have an understanding of how much we do have so that we may reach out to those who do not!  We must continue to help others in our own country and around the world. Doing this with a proper perspective may require taking inventory of the blessings we already have and not focus on what we don’t have. Because when we see how truly blessed we are and what we have, our perspective will be much different.

In the next coming weeks I will be in an area of Ecuador that is financially poor. The people on the other hand are unbelievably loving and caring. They are rich in many ways that many of us couldn’t understand. I will be sharing with you my experiences and thoughts while I am away!

Failure is good for you! Really....

I don't know if you have noticed in recent years that our culture avoids failure. My oldest son played youth baseball this summer. They didn't keep track of the score in their baseball games. So me being the person I am asked why? The answer....... they didn't want to discourage the kids if the lost. Really? So we want them to grow up to think that they can always win? We want  them to think they should be successful at everything? That is crazy! This wont build character! Failure builds endurance, perseverance and persistence. We have all heard the examples of people like Thomas Edison. Someone once asked Edison about the 1,000 patents he had on failed light bulbs and if it discouraged him? His reply, was that he had learned a thousand ways not to build a light bulb! Now that is a totally different way of looking at failure! 
How about Micheal Jordan? Now I wont lie I am a huge Jordan fan! No pun intended! Jordan was cut his freshman year from the basketball team. Instead of letting that failure get him down and discourage him, he let it fuel him and drive him to become one of the greatest basketball players of all time. Even after being in the NBA failure drove him to be better and never let losing or failing bother him. Here is a great Nike commercial that shows it....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45mMioJ5szc. He always let those faults and failure drive him to better his game and himself.

The point for us? Do not let failure hold you back! We have to change our mental prospect or view on failure. We need understand that we cannot win every baseball game. So times our business' will fail, our friendships will fail. Even our diets will fail! But that is not an excuse to just give up. It should be what drives us to become better. We can, like many in society, let failure destroy our lives or we can let it fuel us to the top. If you grew up in the 90's you will understand this, " I wanna be like Mike"! Light a fire inside and go after it! Don't let a fear of failure control you, hold you back anymore. Be relentless!



 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4 : 13

Being Relentless

As we start let me define for you what the meaning of relentless is;

 

1. Unyielding in severity or strictness; unrelenting:

2. Steady and persistent; unremitting

 

The goal of this blog is to help us, me included, become relentless in our pursuits in life. Not just to acheive goals or a specific level, but pursue them with intense strictness! To be relentless in being a father. To be relentless as husband. To be relentless as a speaker.

This doesnt happen the easy way. There is no simple formula to help you become relentless. It is something that has to take over you entire life and be part of your entire life. Physically, Mentally and Spiritually. Wanting to become a relentless person will require you to not only face the future but face somethings in your past that have held you back. So, as Jeffery Gitomer says, "Its time to Kick your own butt"!

 

Remember the only one holding you back is you!

 

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:13